by Edgar Allan Poe
TRUE! --nervous --very, very dreadfully nervous I had been and am; but
why will you say that I am mad? The disease had sharpened my senses
--not destroyed --not dulled them. Above all was the sense of hearing
acute. I heard all things in the heaven and in the earth. I heard many
things in hell. How, then, am I mad? Hearken! and observe how healthily
--how calmly I can tell you the whole story.
It is impossible to
say how first the idea entered my brain; but once conceived, it haunted
me day and night. Object there was none. Passion there was none. I
loved the old man. He had never wronged me. He had never given me
insult. For his gold I had no desire. I think it was his eye! yes, it
was this! He had the eye of a vulture --a pale blue eye, with a film
over it. Whenever it fell upon me, my blood ran cold; and so by degrees
--very gradually --I made up my mind to take the life of the old man,
and thus rid myself of the eye forever.
Now this is the point.
You fancy me mad. Madmen know nothing. But you should have seen me. You
should have seen how wisely I proceeded --with what caution --with what
foresight --with what dissimulation I went to work! I was never kinder
to the old man than during the whole week before I killed him. And every
night, about midnight, I turned the latch of his door and opened it
--oh so gently! And then, when I had made an opening sufficient for my
head, I put in a dark lantern, all closed, closed, that no light shone
out, and then I thrust in my head. Oh, you would have laughed to see how
cunningly I thrust it in! I moved it slowly --very, very slowly, so
that I might not disturb the old man's sleep. It took me an hour to
place my whole head within the opening so far that I could see him as he
lay upon his bed. Ha! would a madman have been so wise as this, And
then, when my head was well in the room, I undid the lantern
cautiously-oh, so cautiously --cautiously (for the hinges creaked) --I
undid it just so much that a single thin ray fell upon the vulture eye.
And this I did for seven long nights --every night just at midnight
--but I found the eye always closed; and so it was impossible to do the
work; for it was not the old man who vexed me, but his Evil Eye. And
every morning, when the day broke, I went boldly into the chamber, and
spoke courageously to him, calling him by name in a hearty tone, and
inquiring how he has passed the night. So you see he would have been a
very profound old man, indeed, to suspect that every night, just at
twelve, I looked in upon him while he slept.
Upon the eighth
night I was more than usually cautious in opening the door. A watch's
minute hand moves more quickly than did mine. Never before that night
had I felt the extent of my own powers --of my sagacity. I could
scarcely contain my feelings of triumph. To think that there I was,
opening the door, little by little, and he not even to dream of my
secret deeds or thoughts. I fairly chuckled at the idea; and perhaps he
heard me; for he moved on the bed suddenly, as if startled. Now you may
think that I drew back --but no. His room was as black as pitch with the
thick darkness, (for the shutters were close fastened, through fear of
robbers,) and so I knew that he could not see the opening of the door,
and I kept pushing it on steadily, steadily.
I had my head in,
and was about to open the lantern, when my thumb slipped upon the tin
fastening, and the old man sprang up in bed, crying out --"Who's there?"
I kept quite still and said nothing. For a whole hour I did not
move a muscle, and in the meantime I did not hear him lie down. He was
still sitting up in the bed listening; --just as I have done, night
after night, hearkening to the death watches in the wall.
Presently
I heard a slight groan, and I knew it was the groan of mortal terror.
It was not a groan of pain or of grief --oh, no! --it was the low
stifled sound that arises from the bottom of the soul when overcharged
with awe. I knew the sound well. Many a night, just at midnight, when
all the world slept, it has welled up from my own bosom, deepening, with
its dreadful echo, the terrors that distracted me. I say I knew it
well. I knew what the old man felt, and pitied him, although I chuckled
at heart. I knew that he had been lying awake ever since the first
slight noise, when he had turned in the bed. His fears had been ever
since growing upon him. He had been trying to fancy them causeless, but
could not. He had been saying to himself --"It is nothing but the wind
in the chimney --it is only a mouse crossing the floor," or "It is
merely a cricket which has made a single chirp." Yes, he had been trying
to comfort himself with these suppositions: but he had found all in
vain. All in vain; because Death, in approaching him had stalked with
his black shadow before him, and enveloped the victim. And it was the
mournful influence of the unperceived shadow that caused him to feel
--although he neither saw nor heard --to feel the presence of my head
within the room.
When I had waited a long time, very patiently,
without hearing him lie down, I resolved to open a little --a very, very
little crevice in the lantern. So I opened it --you cannot imagine how
stealthily, stealthily --until, at length a simple dim ray, like the
thread of the spider, shot from out the crevice and fell full upon the
vulture eye.
It was open --wide, wide open --and I grew furious
as I gazed upon it. I saw it with perfect distinctness --all a dull
blue, with a hideous veil over it that chilled the very marrow in my
bones; but I could see nothing else of the old man's face or person: for
I had directed the ray as if by instinct, precisely upon the damned
spot.
And have I not told you that what you mistake for madness
is but over-acuteness of the sense? --now, I say, there came to my ears a
low, dull, quick sound, such as a watch makes when enveloped in cotton.
I knew that sound well, too. It was the beating of the old man's heart.
It increased my fury, as the beating of a drum stimulates the soldier
into courage.
But even yet I refrained and kept still. I
scarcely breathed. I held the lantern motionless. I tried how steadily I
could maintain the ray upon the eve. Meantime the hellish tattoo of the
heart increased. It grew quicker and quicker, and louder and louder
every instant. The old man's terror must have been extreme! It grew
louder, I say, louder every moment! --do you mark me well I have told
you that I am nervous: so I am. And now at the dead hour of the night,
amid the dreadful silence of that old house, so strange a noise as this
excited me to uncontrollable terror. Yet, for some minutes longer I
refrained and stood still. But the beating grew louder, louder! I
thought the heart must burst. And now a new anxiety seized me --the
sound would be heard by a neighbour! The old man's hour had come! With a
loud yell, I threw open the lantern and leaped into the room. He
shrieked once --once only. In an instant I dragged him to the floor, and
pulled the heavy bed over him. I then smiled gaily, to find the deed so
far done. But, for many minutes, the heart beat on with a muffled
sound. This, however, did not vex me; it would not be heard through the
wall. At length it ceased. The old man was dead. I removed the bed and
examined the corpse. Yes, he was stone, stone dead. I placed my hand
upon the heart and held it there many minutes. There was no pulsation.
He was stone dead. His eve would trouble me no more.
If still
you think me mad, you will think so no longer when I describe the wise
precautions I took for the concealment of the body. The night waned, and
I worked hastily, but in silence. First of all I dismembered the
corpse. I cut off the head and the arms and the legs.
I then
took up three planks from the flooring of the chamber, and deposited all
between the scantlings. I then replaced the boards so cleverly, so
cunningly, that no human eye --not even his --could have detected any
thing wrong. There was nothing to wash out --no stain of any kind --no
blood-spot whatever. I had been too wary for that. A tub had caught all
--ha! ha!
When I had made an end of these labors, it was four
o'clock --still dark as midnight. As the bell sounded the hour, there
came a knocking at the street door. I went down to open it with a light
heart, --for what had I now to fear? There entered three men, who
introduced themselves, with perfect suavity, as officers of the police. A
shriek had been heard by a neighbour during the night; suspicion of
foul play had been aroused; information had been lodged at the police
office, and they (the officers) had been deputed to search the premises.
I smiled, --for what had I to fear? I bade the gentlemen
welcome. The shriek, I said, was my own in a dream. The old man, I
mentioned, was absent in the country. I took my visitors all over the
house. I bade them search --search well. I led them, at length, to his
chamber. I showed them his treasures, secure, undisturbed. In the
enthusiasm of my confidence, I brought chairs into the room, and desired
them here to rest from their fatigues, while I myself, in the wild
audacity of my perfect triumph, placed my own seat upon the very spot
beneath which reposed the corpse of the victim.
The officers
were satisfied. My manner had convinced them. I was singularly at ease.
They sat, and while I answered cheerily, they chatted of familiar
things. But, ere long, I felt myself getting pale and wished them gone.
My head ached, and I fancied a ringing in my ears: but still they sat
and still chatted. The ringing became more distinct: --It continued and
became more distinct: I talked more freely to get rid of the feeling:
but it continued and gained definiteness --until, at length, I found
that the noise was not within my ears.
No doubt I now grew very
pale; --but I talked more fluently, and with a heightened voice. Yet the
sound increased --and what could I do? It was a low, dull, quick sound
--much such a sound as a watch makes when enveloped in cotton. I gasped
for breath --and yet the officers heard it not. I talked more quickly
--more vehemently; but the noise steadily increased. I arose and argued
about trifles, in a high key and with violent gesticulations; but the
noise steadily increased. Why would they not be gone? I paced the floor
to and fro with heavy strides, as if excited to fury by the observations
of the men --but the noise steadily increased. Oh God! what could I do?
I foamed --I raved --I swore! I swung the chair upon which I had been
sitting, and grated it upon the boards, but the noise arose over all and
continually increased. It grew louder --louder --louder! And still the
men chatted pleasantly, and smiled. Was it possible they heard not?
Almighty God! --no, no! They heard! --they suspected! --they knew!
--they were making a mockery of my horror!-this I thought, and this I
think. But anything was better than this agony! Anything was more
tolerable than this derision! I could bear those hypocritical smiles no
longer! I felt that I must scream or die! and now --again! --hark!
louder! louder! louder! louder!
"Villains!" I shrieked,
"dissemble no more! I admit the deed! --tear up the planks! here, here!
--It is the beating of his hideous heart!"
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